StoryWorks

I want to read, "You Can't Say You Can't Play" by Vivian Gussin Paley
via hup.harvard.edu

I heard Vivian Paley interviewed on NPR's "This American Life" earlier today about her book, "You Can't Say You Can't Play". In this book, she described what happened when she established a new rule for her kindergarten classroom -- You can't say: "You can't play".

She asked the kids which was worse, being excluded and having no one to play with or being forced to play with someone you don't like. Eventually the kids came around to understand that life is better when we're kind to one another.

Interestingly, when she asked the older kids in her school -- 4th and 5th graders -- they assured her her new rule would never work. Yet they had some nostalgia for when they were younger and kids weren't as mean. (Already at that age, kids had become segregated between those who were accepted and those who weren't accepted.)

The whole episode reminded me of when I was in 6th grade and our teacher scolded the entire class for being so unkind to one student named Rosie. It was mostly the girls in the class who were mean. Rosie was not the brightest kid and she was from a poorer family. She was shy and by 6th grade, her social skills were not the same as the rest of the class.

One day when Rosie was not in class, the teacher explained how we needed to do a better job of including Rosie. I remember listening and being unimpressed until our teacher, who we loved, started crying. We all were so sad we had disappointed her.

I don't know if the class came around and included Rosie. I can't remember. I do remember that my crying 6th grade teacher made an impression on me that I needed to be more aware of those left out and left behind. I knew I had to include them.

That was probably the best thing I learned in 6th grade.

Filed under: Vivian Paley You Can't Say You Can't Play
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